By Theodora WellsFeminist, Business Communications & Training Consultant
Los Angeles, CA
1970
There is much concern today about the future of man, which means, of course, both men and women -- generic Man. For a woman to take exception to this use of the term "man" is often seen as defensive hair-splitting by an "emotional female."
The following experience is an invitation to awareness in which you are asked to feel into, and stay with, your feelings through each step, letting them absorb you. If you start intellectualizing, try to turn it down and let your feelings again surface to your awareness.
* Consider reversing the generic term Man. Think of the future of Woman which, of course, includes both women and men. Feel into that, sense its meaning to you -- as a woman -- as a man.
* Think of it always being that way, every day of your life. Feel the everpresence of woman and feel the nonpresence of man. Absorb what it tells you about the importance and value of being woman -- of being man.
* Recall that everything you have ever read all your life uses only female pronouns -- she, her -- meaning both girls and boys, both women and men. Recall that most of the voices on radio and most of the faces on TV are women's -- when important events are covered -- on commercials -- and on the late talk shows. Recall that you have no male senator representing you in Washington.
* Feel into the fact that women are the leaders, the power-centers, the prime-movers. Man, whose natural role is husband and father, fulfills himself through nurturing children and making the home a refuge for woman. This is only natural to balance the biological role of woman who devotes her entire body to the race during pregnancy.
* Then feel further into the obvious biological explanation for woman as the ideal -- her genital construction. By design, female genitals are compact and internal, protected by her body. Male genitals are so exposed that he must be protected from outside attack to assure the perpetuation of the race. His vulnerability clearly requires sheltering.
* Thus, by nature, males are more passive than females, and have a desire in sexual relations to be symbolically engulfed by the protective body of the woman. Males psychologically yearn for this protection, fully realizing their masculinity at this time -- feeling exposed and vulnerable at other times. The male is not fully adult until he has overcome his infantile tendency to penis orgasm and has achieved the mature surrender of the testicle orgasm. He then feels himself a "whole man" when engulfed by the woman.
* If the male denies these feelings, he is unconsciously rejecting his masculinity. Therapy is thus indicated to help him adjust to his own nature. Of course, therapy is administered by a woman, who has the education and wisdom to facilitate openness leading to the male's growth and self-actualization.
* To help him feel into his defensive emotionality, he is invited to get in touch with the "child" in him. He remembers his sister's jeering at his primitive genitals that "flop around foolishly." She can run, climb and ride horseback unencumbered. Obviously, since she is free to move, she is encouraged to develop her body and mind in preparation for her active responsibilities of adult womanhood. The male vulnerability needs female protection, so he is taught the less active, caring, virtues of homemaking.
* Because of his clitoris-envy, he learns to strap up his genitals, and learns to feel ashamed and unclean because of his nocturnal emissions. Instead, he is encouraged to keep his body lean and dream of getting married, waiting for the time of his fulfillment -- when "his woman" gives him a girl-child to carry on the family name. He knows that if it is a boy-child he has failed somehow -- but they can try again.
In getting to your feelings on being a woman -- on being a man -- stay with the sensing you are now experiencing. As the words begin to surface, say what you feel from inside you.
